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2.49 Back Home

August 2, 2014

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The last night of the vacation was a relaxed one.  Bianca and Allie chose to visit a nearby hot springs, and spent the night soaking and enjoying the lush setting.  They said little, both lost in an inner world that couldn’t be explained to the other, no matter how close the two had grown.

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Eventually, Allie retired for the night and returned to the hotel, but Bianca stayed, wanting to linger, to make the moment last as long as she could.  She didn’t want to tell Allie, but in the last few days she’d thought constantly of Joel.  Bianca knew her girls had planned this vacation as a way to help her forget, to move on, but they didn’t know.  How could they know?  They were well meaning girls, wonderful children she’d raised into thoughtful caring adults.  But they were too young to understand she would never forget, never move on.  Her Joel would always be with her, and she with him – in mind if not in body and spirit.

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The first day back, neither DiPotere wanted to let the vacation end, so they didn’t.  They read books, and chatted over coffee, napped and generally lounged around the house.  There was a connection they shared now, a special bond that had brought them closer together, not just in the past week, but in the past months of Bianca’s grief.

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At some point in the afternoon, Allie decided to go to bed, protesting jet lag, and a bit of a stomachache.  Bianca took this as her chance to do what she had most wanted to do since returning home, but hadn’t.  She didn’t want her sweet girls to worry about her anymore.  She’d slipped into the bonds of depression over losing Joel, and that couldn’t go on.  But right at that moment she wanted to be near him, to sit by his grave, and think of him, and all the plans they had left unfinished.

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It wasn’t depression, now.  She realized she’d mourned for more than just his loss, she’d mourned for the loss of them, the two of them, the couple they had been for so long – loving, caring, affectionate.  They filled each other’s lives, and hearts, and souls, in ways that couldn’t be expressed in ordinary words.  No one understood.  Most people lived in shells of marriages, she knew.  But not her.  She’d chosen Joel, and he’d chosen her, and that was how it was.

And now she was alone, but not alone.  For she was a DiPotere, and she could see things others could not.  She knew her Joel was still with her, and they would be together again.

 

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2 Comments leave one →
  1. Agnes permalink
    August 18, 2014 3:05 am

    Are you going to make more chapters?

  2. pieridae permalink*
    August 19, 2014 7:23 pm

    Hi Agnes, and yes! I’ve been writing this story for like ten years, so you’ll have to forgive my slowness. I have a super busy life, and summer is my busiest time of all. Next chapter, soon!

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